2
2
The Locrian
by Redlac
A story about our relationship with the future.
Roasts
herogameco 2 years ago
Story/Writing/Dialogue Game GraphicsReally enjoyed the game, great work! My thoughts:
* The story was very intriguing and had great pacing. Just enough set up to get you acquainted with the setting and then jumps right into the juicy stuff. The setting was also familiar enough to feel plausible, while also being very creative. You did a great job of explaining new things--like epochs and floating buildings--but I felt confused at times about certain Epoch dialogue options. They were distressed/grayed out and couldn't be clicked on (which I'm sure is intentional), but I didn't understand why.
* The use of music to set different moods was excellent. Especially the heart-pumping music in the exciting/scary parts. To improve this part, I would make the transitions between tracks not so abrupt. Maybe a second of fade in/fade out.
* The use of black and white to differentiate between the current world and the Epoch world was simple yet effective. You might consider changing fonts as well.
* You might want to let people know up front that this game is designed to be played in one sitting, as I couldn't find anywhere to save the game.
* Aesthetically, I think the game could benefit from some cohesion. For example, your logo is really cool, but I'm not sure it fits with the actual story. It looks antique or even ancient, while the story is highly modern. If you want the game to match the logo, however, I would recommend changing the gameplay text to a serif font. Ultimately, I would change the logo to something more modern and create (or hire an artist to create) a really evocative image of Tierham or perhaps the sickly tree. You could go ultra modern with just a sleek image of an Epoch pill. I would then use that image as the background of your title screen to immediately set the mood.
* For UI, I would add some visual feedback when buttons are clicked plus a subtle click sound.
* The story was very intriguing and had great pacing. Just enough set up to get you acquainted with the setting and then jumps right into the juicy stuff. The setting was also familiar enough to feel plausible, while also being very creative. You did a great job of explaining new things--like epochs and floating buildings--but I felt confused at times about certain Epoch dialogue options. They were distressed/grayed out and couldn't be clicked on (which I'm sure is intentional), but I didn't understand why.
* The use of music to set different moods was excellent. Especially the heart-pumping music in the exciting/scary parts. To improve this part, I would make the transitions between tracks not so abrupt. Maybe a second of fade in/fade out.
* The use of black and white to differentiate between the current world and the Epoch world was simple yet effective. You might consider changing fonts as well.
* You might want to let people know up front that this game is designed to be played in one sitting, as I couldn't find anywhere to save the game.
* Aesthetically, I think the game could benefit from some cohesion. For example, your logo is really cool, but I'm not sure it fits with the actual story. It looks antique or even ancient, while the story is highly modern. If you want the game to match the logo, however, I would recommend changing the gameplay text to a serif font. Ultimately, I would change the logo to something more modern and create (or hire an artist to create) a really evocative image of Tierham or perhaps the sickly tree. You could go ultra modern with just a sleek image of an Epoch pill. I would then use that image as the background of your title screen to immediately set the mood.
* For UI, I would add some visual feedback when buttons are clicked plus a subtle click sound.
Redlac 2 years ago
Thanks a lot for your feedback, you make some great points in here. I'm glad you enjoyed the game, thanks for playing.
